Category Archives: Personal Empowerment

GRAFENWOEHR, Germany -- For spouses, volunteering in a military unit is a powerful tool for personal empowerment, networking, becoming part of the community and building interpersonal relationships within families.

Soldier and Family Readiness Groups support the commander in ensuring family members are offered sponsors when coming to Germany, and receive calendars, information and updates about the unit. Additionally, many SFRGs have fundraisers and social events to build espirit de corps.

"At the end of the day, all we really have is each other," Col. Thomas M. Hough, commander of the 2nd Cavalry Regiment, said at a recent volunteer recognition ceremony. "It's those volunteers that make our lives a little better."

SFRG volunteers have lasting effects on the organization and the community, especially if they choose to volunteer as a sponsor for an incoming spouse.

"When you come here, there is a language barrier, so it's hard to get things done off post, so on post the FRG is there to give you information," said Wendy Snow Wright, senior advisor of the 1st Squadron, 2nd Cavalry Regiment SFRG. "The ability to have somebody that has been here longer, and has already gone through all of the steps, to have that person be able to tell you 'hey, this works, that doesn't work,' is very helpful."

Beyond what volunteers can bring to the unit, being a part of the SFRG can have intrinsic motivators, and increase personal resiliency for its members. Volunteers within the unit are more aware of the unit's activities, can increase social networks and have greater knowledge of the events going on within the garrison.

"The SFRG offers members the chance to be part of the community," said Sharon Stewart, program manager for Mobilization and Deployment Readiness at U.S. Army Garrison Bavaria's Army Community Service. "It helps build that line of communication for the unit."

Spouses that are new to Tower Barracks and Rose Barracks can learn more about volunteering at the upcoming Career and Volunteer Fair taking place Nov. 7 from 10 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. at the Tower View Conference Center.

The Career and Volunteer Fair features over 40 booths of local organizations that are hiring, offering volunteer opportunities that enhance job skills, providing training and education opportunities, or offering support services to spouses looking for jobs.

"Fortunately, there are volunteer opportunities in our community that can be utilized to maintain skills, experience and even professional certifications," said Bethany Stephens, the soldier and family readiness support assistant at the 18th Military Police Brigade. "The Career and Volunteer Fair is your one-stop shop for connecting with those resources."

USAG Bavaria's Army Community Service provides family advocacy, volunteer, relocation, deployment, employment and financial support services to Soldiers, Department of the Army civilians and families through their offices in Rose Barracks, Tower Barracks, Hohenfels and Garmisch. Learn more at acsbavaria.checkappointments.com.

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Soldier and Family Readiness Groups empower spouses, support a ready force - United States Army

Updated October 24, 2019 12:43:08

Circling the athletics track at the end of her street, Sally Heppleston felt like a fraud.

She wasn't a runner. In fact, for someone who had never even stepped foot in a gym, a foray into fitness hadn't really been on the books.

But following the devastating stillbirth of her first child, Hope, and two more pregnancies in quick succession, Sally irrevocably found herself "spiralling out of life-changing grief into being a mum with two small children".

"[Running] was my escape from the kids," she said. "I needed something to do just for me."

"I'd been grieving, I'd been mothering, and I just had neglected myself for so long, so the running for me was something to do out on my own."

Though her story is unique, Sally's experience is far from an anomaly.

She is one of a growing number of women finding empowerment through exercise as they navigate the unpredictable path of motherhood and the demands that come with it.

"What we're seeing is an increasing rate of women wanting to start running," said Nicole French, an exercise physiologist and director of Exercise for Rehabilitation and Health.

"The biggest thing [that they're telling us] is that lack of control. Everything is changing for them. They want to feel empowered in some way and they want to be in control of something."

It should come as little surprise that the transition into parenthood often goes hand in hand with a decline in exercise.

In a trial examining physical activity trends across non-parents, first-time parents and second-time parents, up to 50 per cent of adults who were regularly active dropped their physical activity behaviours when they had children.

This deficit was still present after five years.

Ms French said sleep deprivation and a change in routine or lack thereof were often to blame.

"What many mums report is that in addition to these things going on, they can actually feel quite guilty about investing any time into themselves," she said.

"They'll also talk about judgement from family and friends if they're not seen to be investing every single minute of the day into their newborn, and they're very fearful of being judged as bad parents."

It's hardly a phenomenon limited to Australia. A recent survey of 1,000 mothers in the United Kingdom found six in 10 felt that they were neglecting their family by taking time out to exercise.

It's a sentiment Nicole Bunyon is attune to.

The mother of three and ultra-marathon runner founded Running Mums Australia, a grassroots community of parents with a passion for pounding the pavement, while juggling the demands of motherhood.

What started as a small following on Facebook has sparked a nationwide movement of mothers who identify with her message.

"When I was a younger mum with young children, I did feel guilty about taking time out to run or do my own thing, but over the years I see just how important it is for myself to have goals and work towards them," she said.

"I think I am a better mother by showing my kids that I can commit to something, work hard at it and achieve it, no matter how hard it seems.

"It also means time for me as a mum to connect with myself, my friends and nature."

While the physical benefits of exercise are widely acknowledged, according to Dr Justin Coulson, there's also a psychological basis behind the pursuit of fitness.

The parenting expert says the sense of volition and autonomy that exercise brings can be an important circuit breaker for parents.

"When you're exercising, it's something that you're freely choosing, it's a passion. It's just something you can do because it feels great," he said.

"Whereas when it comes to family life, many parents will say to me, 'I feel so trapped. And I get out on the bike, or I get out on my run... because I feel like I'm free, I feel like it's my release'."

With the support of her husband who was conscious of the fact that she "needed an outlet", particularly when her children were younger Sally made sure she set aside time to lace up her sneakers.

In between "breastfeeding and nappies and the naps that they weren't having", she said it was something "I could really do for me".

"And on my own, which was good because life is busy and noisy with little kids at home, so the running was a real outlet."

Though exercise can serve as an important reprieve for those experiencing major upheavals in their home lives, experts have warned it's not all liberation and lycra.

According to Ms French, the fruition of social media trendsetters "racing back to pre-birth bodies" is encouraging women to push themselves beyond their limits.

"I have heard and seen firsthand people jumping back into things like high intensity interval training classes two weeks after giving birth," she said.

"A lot of the instructors that lead these programs, they sort of embrace it and celebrate it and glorify it, which is quite scary. They have this 'good on you, I wish I had more people like you' mentality."

Ms French said the phenomenon was putting women at increased risk of bleeding and prolapse. Longer term, she said, those in the health sector were seeing "higher incidents of chronic lower back pain and incontinence".

But it's not just the potential physical consequences of overexercising that experts point to.

After becoming parents, Dr Coulson believes some couples begin to take their relationships for granted, and turn to exercise to meet their "needs satisfaction".

"So they're no longer looking to their partner and their kids to satisfy the relationship needs that they have," he said.

"They're saying, 'well they're always there and sometimes they're a bit of a burden, but my mates on the bike never ask anything of me, they're just fun and it feels good'."

Though this type of "obsessive passion" can create stress within a relationship, Dr Coulson believes it has much darker consequences.

"I've had conversations with people who openly said, 'I left the three-year-old watching Paw Patrol so I could sneak out for an hour [to exercise]'," he said.

"That's an obsessive passion and it's disturbing. It's concerning and it's child abuse."

According to Dr Coulson, like all things in life, reaping the rewards of exercise comes down to striking the right balance.

"The research shows if we can be consistent three or four times a week and get out there and have that time, we still get to experience a sense of competence," he said.

"We still get the 'me time', the volition, the autonomous 'I'm out here doing what I want'. But we come back, we're fresher, we're able to contribute more and we have greater mental acuity."

To develop realistic exercise expectations postpartum, Ms French adds, women should look at what their personal fitness and health levels were like prior to falling pregnant.

"The major thing is for mums to steer away from looking at a lot of that social media in and around trying to get back to this perfect body and everything so, so quickly," she said.

As far as Nicole Bunyon is concerned, the "perfect body" doesn't exist. She wants women of all shapes, sizes and backgrounds to come together to embrace the benefits of exercise.

"When women see beyond what society perceives as the 'perfect athlete body' they can achieve great things," she said.

A couple of marathons later including the London Marathon, where she raised almost $25,000 for the Stillbirth Foundation it's fair to say Sally doesn't feel like a fraud anymore.

But these days, the avid parkrun volunteer says she's pretty content with sticking to "5 or 10 kilometres".

"That's about all I can fit in around kids and work or whatever, but I'm happy to just stay fit, see my friends and have a coffee afterwards," she quipped.

Topics:exercise-and-fitness,health,community-and-society,family-and-children,parenting,australia

First posted October 24, 2019 05:17:18

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More new mothers are finding empowerment in exercise, but there's one major barrier - ABC News

In the face of things you cant control, you can control your attitude about them.

In 2010, Eric LeGrands life changed forever, when a player for Rutgers, Eric went for a tackle on special teams, hit with the crown of his head and collapsed to the ground.

Eric did not know the immediate ramifications until his mother revealed them to him several weeks later; he was paralyzed from the neck down.

Through the whole ordeal, no one did more for his family than former Rutgers coach, Greg Schiano. When I asked Eric about it, comparing it to my conversations with former Ohio State head coach Jim Tressel, Eric agreed, the best college coaches want to make stand up men, not just football players.

Eric made the decision to continue to be the positive guy in-spite of the grim outlook. That outlook has made an incredible impact, hes regained movement in his shoulders and continues to drive for more every day, as referenced by his frequent social media postings from Kessler Rehabilitation Center.

Ive always been that happy-go-lucky, life of the Party want to be around guy. My entire life, Ive always been like that. And when I got hurt, I said I wasnt going to let this injury define me. I was 20 years old, Im like God willing, I have many, many more years to live. I dont want to be miserable. I hate that feeling of being upset being mad or being disappointed a something. I hate that feeling so I said to myself.

Im not going to let this get to me, I know Im going to need a lot of help. This was a long road ahead of me. But its possible and then, I was overwhelmed by the support it took off it went, not just nationally, it was Internationally. It was all over the place. because I was getting letters from people in China, Australia, reaching out to me, sending me stuff. So Im like, you know it kind of turned into a responsibility and I cant give up now. All these people have eyes on me. Eric LeGrand

Its not just about him, but the people he can impact. Eric has started a foundation, created a clothing line, writer a book and speaks fo people all over the world.

The Tampa Bay Buccaneers signed him to a contract as an undrafted free agent in May 2012. In 2017, LeGrand was inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame as the third recipient of the Warrior Award.

He is the recipient of the Jimmy V Award for Perseverance at the 2012 ESPYs. Eric is also the creator of the Roll Model clothing line.

Eric Le Grand sits down with me, Jeremy Ryan Slate, to talk about impact, big goals and being a Roll Model on the latest episode of the Create Your Own Life Show.

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Former Rutgers Football Star Eric LeGrand on How He Turned Personal Tragedy into Empowerment for Others - Grit Daily

One of the key things Ive learned in my career as an engineer is that complex problems are best solved by diverse teams. If we want to see a problem from every angle, we need input from every perspective.

In practical terms, this means combining a range of skillsets from talented people with a variety of backgrounds.

As a new and growing team with a start-up spirit, we have a unique opportunity in MSD Biotech, Dublin, to co-create a culture that promotes an inclusive workforce. New teams like ours have a chance to think and act differently and we can build diversity in from the get-go.

We want to attract talented people from backgrounds that go beyond the traditional engineering qualifications and experiences. MSD adopt a blended and strategic approach to hiring talent, not only seeking people with experience in traditional engineering or pharma, but we also hire people from many different backgrounds and qualifications. We then provide the training they need to thrive in our organisation.

We also have a focus on gender balance in our engineering roles.

According to Engineers Ireland, only 12 per centof engineering professionals in Ireland are female. In MSD Biotech, a third of all our engineering recruits on-site are female a development were proud of, yet we still see the opportunity to enhance our diverse talent pool.

There are a number of ways in which MSD Ireland are actively working to enhance the flow of talented young women into STEM careers. As an example, in 2019 we ran a campaign during Engineers Week to spotlight our female engineers and showcase the array of roles they hold across our business.

The culture change we are fostering in our engineering teams goes beyond expanding skillsets and striving for gender balance. Our teams are globally diverse, attracting people from around the world with a range of ethnic and cultural backgrounds. My own team has members from eight countries, and this is likely to expand as we grow. This brings its own opportunities for incorporating diverse perspectives and enhances our ability to identify new solutions to technical problems.

MSD biotech Dublin is a fantastic place to work because wemergea unique culture of diversity and inclusion with true individual and team empowerment. I personally feel very privileged to not only be part of an organisation that has such a positive impact on peoples lives but one that truly embraces the strength of everyones individual and unique contribution - Emma Mansbridge, Engineering Manager at MSD Biotech, Dublin

Of course, building a more diverse workforce is not enough diversity and inclusion go hand-in-hand. That is why we offer all our people equal personal and professional development opportunities, allowing them to grow their careers in an environment that empowers them to succeed.

Our MSD Womens Network in Ireland is playing an active role in ensuring that workplaces are inclusive and supports talented team members to pursue developmental career opportunities.

The Network hosts an annual conference which attracts women from across the business world in Ireland.

I believe when a person sees talented credible role models in inspiring roles, it gives them something to aspire to. To borrow a phraseif you cant see it, you cant be it.

Diversity and inclusion have obvious benefits in terms of offering equal opportunities. Our experience is that it also delivers happier, better performing engineering teams which benefits everyone.

I believe we can achieve diversity by design. Lets build a culture and a mindset that makes diversity and inclusion the norm. Together we can engineer better workplaces for all.

Explore MSD careers at jobs.msd.com/Ireland

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Embedding a diverse and inclusive culture, from the beginning - Irish Times

Deborah Bee/Tiffanie Darke

What is it that gives someone the confidence to walk into a room full of people with a smile on their face and a steady hand before delivering a powerful talk?

Sure, its partly personality, but even the most successful people have their confidence crutches; the little things that pep them up and give them that internal nudge that says, 'Go on, youve got this'.

This might be a wickedly high heel that quite literally makes you stand taller and gain a sense of presence; it might be reciting a positive mantra in your head; or perhaps a specific shade of lipstick that makes you feel your very best.

Fragrance, meanwhile, has long been a proven mood booster. Ingredients including orange blossom and jasmine, found in fragrances like narciso rodriguez for her pure musc, have been scientifically shown to elevate our state of mind. Evoking a feeling of empowerment is at the heart of this brand's perfume, but we also start to make our own life-long library of personal, positive scent associations from the moment were born: when we access these smells they can flood us with confidence-boosting good vibes.

"Days are full of situations where we interact with others," says psychologist Dr Cline Manetta, consumer research scientist at fragrance developer IFF. "Studies show that at these moments, we can be reassured by our fragrance because it enhances our sense of who we are; it asserts our identity, our personality, and can even help project who we want to be, which drives confidence."

Heres what gives our five contributors their confidence boost

"When I want to feel confident, I always wear incredible underwear. No one knows you are wearing it apart from you, which warms you from the inside out. The knowledge that you are conservative and presentable on the outside cutting a fine figure in a beautifully fitting Roland Mouret dress or a strong silhouette in a Saint Laurent trouser suit but a lion and a vamp within, does wonders for the self assertion, I find."

"Unsurprisingly, Im an advocate for a little bit of make-up every day to make you feel good; personally, it gives me a feeling of security and confidence.

"My job is to make other people feel happy with the way they look; to make them feel confident, and I find that taking a back seat not being too pushy can really work to your advantage in this sort of role. Being yourself, being natural, kind and considerate to the people around you thats what makes me feel empowered."

Marigay McKee, co-founder and managing partner at Fernbrook Capital Management LLC, and founder of MM Luxe Consulting

"Im a great believer in 'carpe diem', so rising early followed by yoga, a run or a SoulCycle session helps me start the day the right way. I think it frames the mind in a positive manner for focused output."

"Ive also always loved the quote, 'proper preparation prevents poor performance' I think youre always more confident when you are well prepared. For me that means a really good blow-dry, light but well-applied make-up, and a great scent: delicate for daytime (with extra in my drawer at work because the senses react so well to some uplifting fragrance in the middle of the day), and then sultrier for night, which I find always helps add confidence for a special event."

SHOP NOW narciso rodriguez for her eau de toilette, 36.50 - 78.00

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"To feel confident before a speaking engagement or any sort of presentation, my top tip is to rehearse and know exactly how youll start. Open well, tell yourself that youre more than capable of doing this, and the rest will follow. Then throw in good hair and a bright red lip and you can conquer the world!"

"Be comfortable; if youre walking up to a podium or stage, wear something that wont trip you up like a long skirt or shoes that youre unsteady in.

"I always do my research and know who Im talking to, which makes me feel more at ease. It sounds obvious, but you need to be relevant to your audience whether its a roomful of corporates, students or charity supporters.

"Finally, I always spray on a little fragrance the same one Ive always worn. I have a mini version for my bag and I spray a cloud of it whenever Im going to an event that Im even slightly nervous about. I cant actually smell it any more, but I always get comments (mostly from women who want to know what it is), which makes you feel good."

Discover your signature fragrance with narciso rodriguez

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5 successful women share their confidence-boosting secrets - harpersbazaar.com

DALLAS--(BUSINESS WIRE)--

Mary Kay Inc., a leading corporate champion of womens empowerment and entrepreneurship, continues its mission of enriching womens lives as a supporter of the Texas Conference for Women. The conference provides motivation, networking, inspiration, and skill-building for thousands of Texas women each year. The 20th annual Texas Conference for Women will be held October 23-24, 2019, at the Austin Convention Center.

This press release features multimedia. View the full release here: https://www.businesswire.com/news/home/20191024005114/en/

More than 7,500 are registered to attend this years non-profit, non-partisan event, and the theme is The Power of Us: Amplify Your Voice. 2019 marks the fourth year Mary Kay has participated in the conference. The event will feature inspirational keynote speakers, skill-building breakout sessions, and ample opportunities to develop new relationships with other women. Sessions range from personal finance, health and wellness, to career advancement and salary negotiation.

Sheryl Adkins-Green, Chief Marketing Officer at Mary Kay Inc., will be in attendance and will serve as a guest speaker at the Affinity Networking Breakfast on October 24.

Our founder, Mary Kay Ash, believed in the power of womenthats why she built her dream company specifically for them, said Adkins-Green. The Texas Conference for Women is the perfect platform for us to continue our mission of enriching womens lives. For more than 55 years, weve empowered millions of women around the world, and Mary Kay is proud to help support and inspire women from across our home state of Texas during this important conference.

About Mary Kay

One of the original glass ceiling breakers, Mary Kay Ash founded her beauty company more than 55 years ago with three goals: develop rewarding opportunities for women, offer irresistible products, and make the world a better place. That dream has blossomed into a multibillion-dollar company with millions of independent sales force members in nearly 40 countries. Mary Kay is dedicated to investing in the science behind beauty and manufacturing cutting-edge skin care, color cosmetics, nutritional supplements and fragrances. Mary Kay is committed to empowering women and their families by partnering with organizations from around the world, focusing on supporting cancer research, protecting survivors from domestic abuse, beautifying our communities, and encouraging children to follow their dreams. Mary Kay Ashs original vision continues to shineone lipstick at a time. Learn more at MaryKay.com.

View source version on businesswire.com: https://www.businesswire.com/news/home/20191024005114/en/

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Mary Kay Inc. Continues Its Mission of Enriching Womens Lives With Support of the Texas Conference for Women - Yahoo Finance

Ankita SinghDelhi

October 24th, 2019 / 3:41 PM/ Updated 3 hours ago

The problems faced by visually-impaired individuals are multifold. Ranging from lack of accessible facilities to getting an opportunity to upskill themselves, they require an inclusive environment to be fostered in order to become more self-reliant. With the same vision in mind, The Blind Relief Association situated in New Delhi has been helping such individuals lead their lives with confidence and dignity for the past 75 years.

With the festive season around the corner,the association has organised a Blind School Diwali Mela. Started in 1980, the Diwali Mela is held annually at the sprawling grounds near Lal Bahadur Shastri Marg in the premises of the association. The trainees and the staff members could be spotted working swiftly through various stalls where products made by the trainees are showcased. The earnings from this event are directed towards financing the association, which provides free training to the visually-impaired individuals.

While speaking to The Logical Indian, Swapna Merlin, the communication head at the association shares, Atthe association, we aim to boost the confidence of the trainees by giving them training in various areas such as personality development, and spoken English. We also provide vocational courses such as computer training. Apart from training them, we attempt to provide them with resources such as reading the material in Braille and audiobooks on various topics. I feel that they can work as confidently as any other individual when given appropriate training, and it could be a life-changing session for them.

Apart from the Diwali Mela, the association runs a year-long programme for the visually-impaired who have not got any chance to receive a formal education. The association also attempts to provide them with placements and has a list of trainees who are able to transform their personal lives post attending the training sessions. The computer training has assisted many individuals in achieving their career goals.

Wonder Woman of the Candle Unit

Before you buy candles from our Diwali Bazar, see how Padmavati, a multi-skill trainee hailing from the rural parts of Chhattisgarh packs them quickly, neatly and firmly.Turn on the speakers to hear Padma's song!

The Blind Relief Association Delhi , 21, 2019

Mohammed Shakib Khan, one of the trainees hailing from Ghaziabad, shared his story of from being shy to be being able to hold a mic and speak confidently. I was very hesitant in public speaking before coming here. I never had the confidence to speak on mic publicly and never thought that I would be doing story-telling sessions. But post coming here, I have received spoken classes, and it helped me a lot. I have also learnt book-binding and stitching here. It makes me happy to learn new skills, and theres still so much to learn, he said.

Another trainee named Jyoti Prajapati said she regained her confidence after coming to the association.After losing my eyesight, I never thought that I would be able to experience things as before. I was dependent on others, and I felt that I would never be completely on my own. But after coming here, I have gained back my lost confidence, and I dont regret what happened in the past. The skills which Ive gained here help me each day- be it commuting, expressing myself or reading new things. I have found good friends over here, and we stay together like a big family, she said.

Under the aegis of the association, a senior secondary school is also run. The school is recognised by the Directorate of Education, NCT Delhi and CBSE. It provides free education, boarding, lodging, books and other services to boys from nursery till class 12th. At the same time, it encourages them to take part in diverse extracurricular activities. Their main objective is to impart essential skills to the students so that they could become a part of the mainstream. Also, their six-month relaxation-massage training, call-centre programme, and candle-making programme has helped many of them find employment and lead their lives independently.

The life-transforming stories of the visually-impaired individuals appeal to our mind and put in question the present-day state of accessibility for the blind population in our country.The Logical Indian salutes the efforts of the Blind Relief Association that has been and the forefront of empowering the visually impaired individuals for the past 75 years.

Also Read: This Foundation Along With IIT Delhi, Produces Tactile Diagrams & Textbooks For Visually-Impaired Students

Link:

Gifting Empowerment On Diwali For Last 75 Yrs: This Organisation Trains Visually-Impaired On Multiple Skills - The Logical Indian

Megan Thee Stallion is in a bit of a feud with her MUA.

It has been quite the year for Houston hottie Megan Thee Stallion who became a breakout star with her women empowerment persona and uber confidence. The Hot Girl Summer rapper is also a star on social media and loves to share her personal life through videos and live streams. Recently shes been giving herself credit for completing her own makeup looks, but her personal MUA claims she hasnt been beating her face all by herself. Under a preview video for Megans feature in Vogue Magazine, the makeup artist decided to call her out.

The editorial followed Megan around for 24 hours with the help of influencer Jordyn Woods, who asked the MC how she learned to do makeup as she applied powder to her face. Megan explained that she learned from her grandmother, who used to buy her eyeshadow as a kid. So it was awkward timing for her MUA, @Akilaface to comment Makeup By Akilaface, in the comments. And me, Megan replied. But the MUA continued to insist that she had little to do with the process.

No you filled in your eyebrows and put on your lighter MAC powder when I was done, he said. This is not a makeup war I always do your makeup and never get credited. That is hurtful. But Megan didnt let the comment slide and quickly clapped back at the accusations. Woah. First of all if you was really hurt you couldve txt me this. Second you right it aint a war bc we all kno I do my makeup and you touch it up or I let you start it and Ill finish it.

Fans quickly reacted, citing how it was unprofessional for him to call her out in public and that the hottie tribe was always aware that he was involved in her styling. Some fans even pulled old receipts of Akilaface admitting that he and Meg often collab on her cosmetics. Akilaface also works with artists like JT from the City Girls. But it will be interesting to see if he and Megan continue working together after this incident.

More here:

Megan Thee Stallion Claps Back At Makeup Artist Who Accused Her Of Stealing Credit - Urban Islandz

I HADNT intended to watch ITVs documentary Harry & Meghan An African Journey, but there was nothing else on TV on Sunday night that caught my eye, so I stuck with it. And in a way I am glad I did. Its confirmed what a few friends of mine who have had dealings with the young royal couple have told me: they are a bit of a nightmare.

The fact is that although this film was supposed to be a travelogue with a focus on their charity work in Africa, it turned into a classic episode of The Me Show.

Instead of looking just at the hardships of those on the African continent, presenter Tom Bradby, who has known Harry for 20 years, invited the 35-year-old duke to talk about his personal life and struggles with mental health. Venturing into this line of country can only have been part of an agreed plan. There was nothing spontaneous about it. And it showed. (What did appear to be more genuine was Harrys admission that he and his brother, William, have fallen out, of which more below.)

Bradby lobbed the same kind of personal questions at Meghan, though he seemed pretty nervous when he did so. Weirdly, she seemed more confident than Bradby at this point. Anyway, this experienced actress admitted that she struggles with the scrutiny of being married to her husband. She seemed to feel so sorry for herself. Perhaps she expected viewers to feel sorry for her as well. I dont reckon many will have done. But they may have wondered (as I did) why it was that whenever she and Harry were on camera together, she would not take her hand off his shoulder or back. I would find constantly being touched like that intolerable.

With their staggering privilege and newborn son, Harry and Meghan should be among the most content couples on the planet. But theyre not. They are angry and resentful, mainly of the tabloid press. They claim its ruining their lives. It is as though they wont be happy until its written into law that nobody can criticise them in print.Now Meghan is suing the Mail on Sunday for alleged breach of privacy and Harry is suing News UK for alleged phone hacking. Drastic stuff.

Exploring the validity of these legal actions belongs in another column. For now I want to say: I dont feel any pity for them. Yes, Harrys mothers death was dreadfully sad for him and will have left a mark. But this is the point. Since he knows better than most how destructive press intrusion can be, why doesnt he just go about his business quietly, like his uncle Edward or aunt Anne? They seem to cope perfectly well twinning their duties as royals with their personal lives. Indeed, after all that happened between Charles and Diana, one is bound to ask: why didnt Harry, as fifth in line to the throne, make sure he married a sensible woman who feels no need to be famous?

Having worked on various newspapers, I can state with confidence that if Harry and Meghan decided to reveal none of their personal views, to lead more boring lives, and to do what most Britons expect of the monarchy in that old-fashioned way, they would never find themselves in the press other than for the most prosaic reasons. Reporters would tire of them. And they would, in turn, be happier and perhaps more productive. Its very simple: shut up and people will leave you alone.

Far be it from me to criticise another mans marriage, but Harry and his wife ought to stop talking about climate change and female empowerment and just generally stop being so Californian. Either that, or they should do us all a favour and move to California.

As for why Harry and William have fallen out, my source tells me that part of the problem lies between Meghan and Kate Middleton. Meghan does not like her sister-in-law and never has done because she is, for some odd reason, jealous of her. The frostiness is palpable. Meghan has also had to be told not to be rude to the royal staff, who are not used to being ordered around like servants. I will let the tabloids chew over these rumours if they dare.

Link:

If Harry and Meghan would just shut up, they'd soon be left alone - The Conservative Woman

Appreciate your expertise but be willing to learn from anyone. Its fun to have all the answers but its also limiting. Every member of your team provides a unique perspective whether from life experience, career experience, education or their own personal approach that can benefit you and your business. An open mind and the humility necessary to be taught by others offers untold growth potential.

For my series on strong female leaders, I had the pleasure of interviewing Pat Renzi. Pat is a principal with the Life Technology Solutions practice of Milliman and functions as its CEO. Life Technology Solutions provides products and services related to financial and risk reporting and projections, including IntegrateTM, MG-ALFA, and MG-Triton. Pat, who joined the firm in 1999, was elected to the firms board of directors in 2015.

Thank you for joining us Pat! Can you tell us a story about what brought you to your specific career path?

In college I was a math major, though at the time I wasnt entirely sure what I would do with the degree. I took a part time job with Geico Insurance in their finance department while I was pursuing a masters in statistics. By happenstance I was approached by an individual within the company who asked if I had ever considered becoming an actuary. I didnt know what an actuary did at that time, nor did I know the man was putting together Geicos Life Insurance team. I decided to take a chance and try something new and it led me to a thriving career in actuarial systems in the insurance industry.

Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you began leading your company?

The Life Technology Solutions practice at Milliman was operating as a small, 15 person team focused on shrink-wrapped software solutions for companies in need of actuarial solutions. Somewhat out of the blue we were approached by The Phoenix Group, one of the largest providers of insurance solutions in the United Kingdom, after they had read an article showing that our small, niche software was compatible with IBMs grid. Phoenix was interested in seeing if we could offer them a solution to fit their needs. This was surprising on a number of levels, most particularly that Phoenix already worked with the largest actuarial software providers in the UK market and we had no software presence in the UK.

While we debated whether the time and resources required to bid on the project made sense for our small team, in the end our natural curiosity and desire to thoughtfully expand our offering led us to an initial meeting, which turned into a proposal and then blossomed into a long standing relationship that fundamentally changed the course of our business. It started by recognizing that our cultures aligned particularly that we each had bold assertions to be the best in the world in our respective fields and continued because of a symbiotic desire to collaborate and create the right tools and the right experiences that could be tailored to the unique needs of The Phoenix Group. More importantly, our team went into the relationship with a listening rather than a telling mentality we heard what the client wanted rather than telling them what they needed.

As a result of that very unexpected engagement that we easily could have turned down for lack of resources, today our team of 15 has grown to over 120, our business is now based around the flagship, end-to-end enterprise solution we created called Integrate, and we continue to partner with Phoenix to deliver cutting-edge solutions to the insurance industry.

Can you share a story about the funniest mistake you made when you were first starting? Can you tell us what lesson you learned from that?

There have been plenty of fluke moments that turned out to be quite fortuitous, such as landing a job as an actuarial student even before I knew what an actuary did. I look back on that experience now and realize that, had I not been willing to jump into the unknown, I would have missed out on a very rewarding career.

Another example is that in my previous story of working with The Phoenix Group our team was asked to map costs to our proposal. Absolute neophytes in pricing models of this scale, our team came up with what we thought was a reasonable amount. Looking back, I recall how we worried it might be too much it was certainly more than any other project we had worked on to that point.

After nervously sharing the number with Phoenix, the CFO came back and told us point-blank it wasnt high enough. He knew at the time what I didnt: that until we agreed on a price that was fair for both parties, we wouldnt be able to invest the longevity, time and resources required to produce what they needed. When we settled on the final price it was more than 3x our original offer! But that experience demonstrated the importance of working with partners who value what you bring to the table and can recognize that all parties involved need to be compensated fairly in order to produce the best results.

What do you think makes your company stand out? Can you share a story?

Our team has built a culture of curiosity. As a leader of a group of 120 individuals, I have recognized that I can (and do!) learn from anyone. Every member of our team offers value and insight that is unique to their own experiences and expertise.

The nature of our business allows us to work with a wide range of clients everyone from early adopters and risk takers, to more middle-of-the-road companies who are looking to us to help them manage their current needs without driving them too far forward too fast. In order to meet the various needs of these clients its critical that we choose to listen rather than tell. This takes a level of humility that isnt always valued in business it feels natural to want to go to clients and present yourself as the expert in your field. The reality is that we do own a level of expertise, but that expertise is only as valuable as our willingness to adapt and grow with our clients.

This mentality has proven incredibly useful for our company and has contributed directly to our ongoing growth, as we continue to engage with clients and present new ideas that not only help their business, but also build out our own product offering.

Are you working on any exciting new projects now? How do you think that will help people?

Our mission as part of the Life Technology Solutions practice at Milliman is to provide solutions to insurance actuaries that free up their time by automating or improving the mundane reporting and modeling tasks on their plate. Weve been quite successful at achieving this goal and have given the actuarial world the precious gift of time. In the age of Big Data, however, we have the opportunity to create value with that time by providing actuaries the tools they need to be leaders in their organizations and drive strategic decisions. Using our platform, which has access to valuable repositories of data, our next step is to help actuaries mine that data to better understand their customers and their business.

What advice would you give to other female leaders to help their team to thrive?

Early in my career I felt that if I was going to be successful and climb the corporate ladder I was going to need to behave like all of the other executives I saw. This was particularly hard for me as it went against my very nature. Overtime I realized how stressful this was and, more importantly, how others do not react well to it. I needed to interact with my colleagues in ways that felt comfortable and natural to me.

One of the most important lessons Ive learned over the years is simply to be myself. As a leader, when you can be yourself you subtly give permission to the rest of your team to also be themselves, and thats really what you want. When team members feel comfortable they are more open and honest. It breeds trust and collaboration and ultimately results in getting the best from every individual.

What advice would you give to other female leaders about the best way to manage a large team?

I believe one of the biggest challenges for leaders male or female is entrusting the people you work with and empowering them with the space and resources necessary to achieve the companys goals. This may be easy when your team is small, but as it grows it becomes even more important to have faith in those you work with and empower them to make decisions. Growing with your team means accepting that you cant always have a say in every decision made trusting in your team may require relinquishing control, but ultimately it allows the work to move forward unimpeded.

Its also critical to let go of an assumption of perfection leading an organization or a team means mistakes are going to happen, whether at your hands or the hands of someone else. Remember mistakes are a valuable and inevitable part of the process, and some of the best learning and growth comes from overcoming a mistake or challenge. Trusting others that they can also learn from mistakes helps free you of the burden of trying to control every outcome.

None of us are able to achieve success without some help along the way. Is there a particular person who you are grateful towards who helped get you to where you are? Can you share a story about that?

I have been lucky in my career and have had a lot of smart, talented people who have trusted me and given me good advice in different ways. One person, Dennis Stanley, led the MG-ALFA team at Milliman before it became the Life Technology Solutions practice. Dennis brought me in specifically to be his successor, but we worked together side by side for 15 years before he retired and turned full leadership over to me.

Dennis is a technical genius but he recognized his own limitations in managing people, clients and the day-to-day side of things. He shared great insights over the years and perhaps most valuable, he taught me to trust myself through the fact that he trusted me. This was an incredibly important lesson because it gave me the freedom to take bigger risks and opened the door to opportunities I might otherwise not have had.

How have you used your success to bring goodness to the world?

The success Ive experienced at Milliman led to an election to the Board of Directors. Today Im chair of the Board committee on corporate social responsibility and diversity and inclusion, an opportunity that allows me to use my time and influence to do good in the world.

One example is through one of the other businesses at Milliman, the MicroInsurance Centre, an initiative to bring insurance to the underdeveloped world. The poorest people around the world suffer the most when something catastrophic happens. Having a safeguard in place, such as insurance in the event of unforeseen circumstances, can help provide stability against things like crop failure or drought, allowing farmers to weather a bad season and prepare for the next.

Another initiative we work with is Math Motivators, a program that allows us to go into local schools to tutor math and, along the way, expose students to careers in math if there is interest. We provide monetary donations to Math Motivators but we also donate our time and talents to help encourage financial literacy.

What are your 5 Leadership Lessons I Learned From My Experience and why. (Please share a story or example for each.)

1) Recognize when fortune is smiling down upon you.

Believe it or not, this happens to all of us but the biggest hurdle is recognizing it. It can be argued that I stumbled into my career choice, but the reality is that an opportunity came unexpectedly my direction and I had to have the courage and foresight to say yes. When an opportunity to branch out our business and product offering was presented to my small team of 15 individuals, rather than rationalize our way out of it we decided to jump in with both feet, and it led to greater growth and opportunity than we could have imagined.

2) Appreciate your expertise but be willing to learn from anyone.

Its fun to have all the answers but its also limiting. Every member of your team provides a unique perspective whether from life experience, career experience, education or their own personal approach that can benefit you and your business. An open mind and the humility necessary to be taught by others offers untold growth potential.

3) Trust others around you.

Feeling that your boss or leaders trust you is an incredibly empowering experience. It offers freedom to experiment and opens the door to growth. Extend that trust to those around you and free yourself of the burden to control every outcome. It often means taking a step outside of the spotlight, but seeing others shine is often more rewarding. Additionally, it also allows you to focus on those areas where you can provide the most value.

4) Focus your efforts on what yields the most value

As a leader of a team or an organization it is easy to slip into a mindset where you focus primarily on those areas where you are most comfortable or are assured of your own level of expertise and experience. This may not be the place where you add the most value however. Its imperative you step outside of your own comfort zone and lend your time and energy to those tasks that will bring the most value to your team and the organization.

5) Rely on your instincts.

In a data-centric world it can be easy to get caught up in the numbers or the data or some other measurable fact. These are valuable tools, but to be truly agile and successful you have to be confident to make quick decisions based on your gut. If youve done the hard work in other areas, your instincts will rarely steer you wrong. As important as it is to trust those around you, its just as important to trust in yourself.

You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger.

I feel very passionate about the role of diversity not just gender or cultural diversity, but diversity of thinking and perspective. I find that both in business and in the world around us we tend to be hierarchical and tied into stereotypes, whether conscious or not, that dictate an individual (including ourselves) must operate within a certain box. This has such a limiting effect on our thinking, and puts us in a position of digging our heels in about what we know and refusing to allow our minds to be influenced or changed.

Carol Dweck wrote a fascinating book called Mindset, where she emphasizes our need as a society to move from a know it all culture to a learn it all culture. Id like to adopt this strategy within my own sphere of influence starting with my family and working my way out to my team, my company and the world.

Can you please give us your favorite Life Lesson Quote? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?

Maya Angelou once said You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. Please remember that your difficulties do not define you. They simply strengthen your ability to overcome.

My mother suffered more tragedy in her lifetime than anyone should, but she always described herself as fortunate as having lived a blessed life. Witnessing that ability to always see the brightness, even through the dark, was profound.

Some of the biggest names in Business, VC funding, Sports, and Entertainment read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US with whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch with, and why? He or she might just see this if we tag them

The person I would most like to meet is Melinda Gates. While I certainly admire what she is doing with the Gates Foundation, Ive seen a new, more public and vocal focus on female empowerment both in business and in the world around us. This extends to education, economic independence, freedom to control our own bodies and decisions, etc. It seems to me she has really found a voice on these matters and it empowers me to use my own platform to advance these causes as well.

See the rest here:

Pat Renzi: Appreciate your expertise but be willing to learn from anyone - Thrive Global