Recognizing Childfree Families On International Family Day – HuffPost

This year, the United Nations recognizes its International Day of Families on May 15. The purpose of this special day is to focus on the role of families and family-oriented policies in promoting education and overall well-being of their members and to support families as the primary educators for young children. Though children are not a required component of family, childfree families do play a significant but generally overlooked role in supporting childrens development.

Of the dozens of childfree women and men Ive interviewed, who form households and families of their own, many note that they are in a unique position to have special and important relationships with children because they are childfree.

This finding is consistent across studies. In a survey of 1,000 non-mothers, marketing firm DeVries Global found that children including nieces, nephews, and the children of friends play an active role in the lives of 80 percent of women who dont have children of their own. And a study of aunts found that they serve important roles as teachers, role models, confidantes, savvy peers, and second mothers in their nieces and nephews lives.

A number of the childfree couples I interviewed described their friendships and other connections with the children in their lives. They shared how their childfree status enables them to connect with children in ways that differ from parents connections.

Jan, an engineer who has been married to her husband Fred for over ten years, also talked about her friendships with children. Jan and Fred count their neighbors among their closest friends and Jan has a special connection with the neighbors 11-year-old daughter.

Children benefit from these connections with adults who arent their parents. Allison and her husband believe they are in a unique position to offer their nine year old niece a broader view of the world than she may receive without their involvement.

Allisons point about getting her nieces issues in a way that others may not is reflected in the reports of children who have close relationships with their aunts who say they value their aunts nonjudgmental advice, open-mindedness, and willingness to discuss topics they preferred not to broach with their parents.

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Aside from their unique friendships with children, my research participants also described how not having kids themselves made them more available to take on special care taking responsibilities for the kids in their lives, such as through legal guardianship or as godparents. Annette, a professor, said she is able to be the godmother to several children because she doesnt have kids of her own, though she added, Thats plenty! when asked if she had plans to say yes to any future godmother requests.

They say it takes a village to raise a child. Childfree people are a part of that village. Perhaps it is in the best interests of children indeed of all villagers that not everyone wants to have children of their own, even those who might make excellent parents. These non-parent figures are essential for children, they provide needed support for parents, and the childfree value these relationships as well.

On this years International Day of Families, lets recognize all families, whether they include children or not, and the important roles they play in providing for the well-being of each other and those in their communities.

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Recognizing Childfree Families On International Family Day - HuffPost