This client physically attacked his financial adviser when confronted about his gambling – MarketWatch

Joe Heider

Demanding clients can push advisers to do better. Joe Heiders client pushed him against a wall.

A financial planner in Cleveland, Ohio, Heider befriended a tech entrepreneur in 1990. Lets call him Dave (not his real name). Over the next decade, Heider offered Dave informal financial advice on occasion.

At first, he had no real money to invest, Heider recalled. But that changed as Daves company grew.

By 2000, Dave became Heiders client. Soon after, their friendship took a nose dive.

For years, Heider had noticed that his pal enjoyed alcohol and gambling. But he never seemed like an addict.

Hed have a drink in his hand at a party, but it wasnt binge drinking, Heider said. And he liked to gamble maybe $100 on a Sunday football game, but he didnt have a bookie or anything.

Yet Heider began to suspect something was amiss. Reviewing Daves wire transfers from his brokerage account, Heider detected several unusually large withdrawals just before the Super Bowl and college basketballs March Madness.

Because his friend had recently sold his business and reaped a windfall, his net worth soared above $7 million. That meant Dave had more money to lose, and Heider helped him craft a plan to alleviate financial worries for the rest of his life. (Both Heider and Dave were in their 40s at the time.)

After Dave moved to another city, Heider retained him as a client, visited regularly and even stayed at his house. Heider realized he needed to confront his chum on his next trip.

Even though he was a friend, when people have problems they dont want to acknowledge it, Heider said. So I brought it up very carefully.

The conversation occurred on a Saturday morning, after Heider awoke to find Daves four landlines lit up in the midst of basketball season. No one else was home.

You have a pattern of unsustainable withdrawals in your portfolio, Heider told his friend later that morning. My concern is what youre doing will destroy the financial plan that we agreed to.

Heider hoped that Dave beefy former professional athlete would reply, Yeah, I know I have a problem.

Instead, he grabbed Heider, lifted him up and shoved him against a wall.

It wasnt like youre wrestling with your brother and you get a little rambunctious, Heider said. It was so violent. It was shocking. I wasnt afraid hed really hurt me. But it pissed me off.

Dave barked at Heider to mind your own business and do your job, but Heider stuck to his message after Dave released his grip.

Im concerned about you as a person, Heider replied. Im concerned youll destroy yourself and everything you have.

The gambling abated in the months that followed, only to resurface with a vengeance. And Daves drinking worsened as well. Eventually, he lost his home and declared personal bankruptcy.

Heider cut the cord with Dave, but looked him up two years later and invited him to dinner. Dave agreed as long as Heider paid.

On his second martini, he starts telling me, Its your fault. You shouldve done an intervention and had me go into a rehab center, Heider said. That was the last time I saw him.

Now 63, Heider extracts a lesson from his experience: Speak up sooner rather than later when a clients behavior threatens their financial future.

The takeaway is to become more assertive earlier when I see signs of trouble, he said.

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This client physically attacked his financial adviser when confronted about his gambling - MarketWatch