Family Caregiving: Adult children need to get involved in caregiving – Times Record

By Bob Meister

(Mrs.) Schwartz is 78. While she thinks her husband does better at home Hes getting 24-hour attention, and you dont get that in a nursing home, she said. friends point out that the arrangement is much harder on her. She worries, too, about costs climbing as Mr. Schwartzs health declines and his needs increase. For now, though, she manages, part of an apparently growing phenomenon: the old taking care of the old. New York Times,July 3, 2015, by Paula Span

The demographic shift I call life-extension means it is no longer rare for folks to live to age90 and older. For example, the Social Security life expectancy calculator concludes that a man who is now 83 years old could expect to live to age 90.6 years. Of course, that doesnt mean he will be healthy during his remaining years and that there will be a Mrs. Schwartz to care for him. Its time for adult children and grandchildren to get involved in caregiving.

A couple of years ago, the AARP and the National Alliance for Caregiving published a study that included results about the unpaid caregivers who are age 75 and older. There are more than three million of them; about half of them care for a spouse, while the others help siblings and relatives. And some, about 8 percent, provide care to their parents.

For several years, my wife cared for a gentleman who was in his mid-90s. John had five children and a large number of grandchildren who didnt find the time to communicate. The two oldest were institutionalized with their own problems, but out of the remaining group, only one took the time to visit once or twice each year.

In part, Johns circumstances encouraged me to begin writing this column. I thought it would be a way to educate Christians about the need to help their parents deal with issues of aging and health problems. Most of all, I was hopeful of influencing churches to incorporate eldercare into senior programs. I thought there would be a stronger family affinity within church groups and therefore greater interest in caring for their own. It hasnt worked out that way.

As I made connections with mega-churches and Christian denominations to get a handle on how they were addressing caregiving and eldercare in particular, I found just one that had started an eldercare program a few years ago. Wynelle Stevens, assistant director forAdventist Community Services has implemented programs for church congregations that emphasize regular communication between family members as a catalyst to caring for each other, especially parents. Anyone interested can see what a comprehensive eldercare program looks like at http://www.communityservices.org/elder-care-tools.

I have decided to take a break from writing this column in order to attend to some other responsibilities. In the meantime, please feel free to contact me at church7@cox.net if you have questions or comments, or you think I could help in any way.

Take care!

Bob Meister is a certified care resource specialist who has been studying Americas aging demographic and has been involved in caregiving and health care since 1989. He can be contacted by email at church7@cox.net.

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Family Caregiving: Adult children need to get involved in caregiving - Times Record