This article is part parody and satire. Liberals aren't all as awesome as we imagine.Liberals aren't the way Conservapedia imagines them either. Though, the article refers to the vast majority!:)
Michael Moore, a liberal
A liberal is somebody with a selfless world view and someone who wants this planet to continue socially evolving into the future and beyond. Liberalism means love and positive thinking, Liberalism is the idea of universal Human rights: it doesn't matter what race you are- black, white, Asian, Arab, Native Americans, etc. or the way you dress or look. Liberals are open-minded and respectful of whoever you are [1] and encourage others not to be ashamed for who they are [2], like gays and poor people. A liberal is a person that is not ashamed of being him/herself.
The Liberal half of America is the one that symbolizes optimism and forward thinking. Liberals believe in gun control (American liberals sometimes disagree about how far to allow responsible weapon ownership). Liberals believe in environmental protection, providing for poor people, gay rights, civil rights. Liberals oppose animal cruelty, and they support basic human nature; meaning the freedom to have sex with the consenting partners they would like without the guilt of the right-wing religious types. Conservative republicans are the evangelical Christian and Greedy Capitalist side of America and love to pass absurd laws like the "mandatory" pledge of abstinence. By the way that doesn't work at all, studies show that teens who pledge for abstinence are 42% more likely to end up having sex anyway (out of curiosity) and are more likely to get pregnant while still in their teen years because they don't understand contraception. Liberals, on the other hand, let those horny teenagers do Sex if they want, as long as they have protection believe we have a responsibility to teach young people responsible sexual practices. Conservatives used to make Interracial marriage, pre-marital sex, homosexuality, and even many common marital sexual practices, illegal (This was the law in many US states during the first half of the 20th Century). While Liberals also limit sexuality in some cases, Liberal limitations are likely to be defense of those seen to be defenseless, for example the requirement for voluntary legal consent.
Liberals are rational thinkers who are open to all views and skeptical of those who follow specific agendas. Unlike conservatives, liberals have open minds and tend to disagree with each other in open debate about issues in order to find what is best. American Liberals believe in the Constitution and the Bill of Rights. Liberals in other countries want similar freedoms in their countries.
Liberals are often not fooled by propaganda and believe in separation of powers. Liberals are very patriotic andvoice their opinion often in protest.
Many of us older American Liberals remember the days when there were many Liberals in both the Democratic and Republican parties. Liberals then as now, disagreed on of the rate of progression of Civil rights, and the amount of intervention necessary to make Capitalism and our government function the best for our citizens and our society, but we always held on to the goal of protecting, and maximizing the value of Life, Liberty, and Property in our society with only the amount of government necessary to achieve those goals.
Prior to the Neoliberal revolution, Liberals represented the centrist position in American politics. For years neoliberals have been trying to convince people that Liberals hold the beliefs of our further left allies. We respect our allies and their opinions, and we will continue to do so. We fight for common goals with our allies, and we will continue to do so. Nevertheless, we are not our allies, we may share short-term goals, but in the end we still differ. Given the amount and rancor of the rhetoric our far-right opponents have devoted to demonizing liberals, I've concluded they still believe we're their most dangerous opponents. I believe we liberals are still the most centrist group in American politics, and I wonder if we're not far more numerous than we even know. I've hope that liberals can still turn our Country from its errant path, achieve government of, by, and for the people, and once again be a beacon of hope for peoples of the world yearning for freedom and prosperity.
Liberals stand up for workers rights
Unlike Conservatives, liberals are logical and consistent.
Liberals are the only hope against the vast right wing conspiracy.
In short, most liberals embody the very essence of awesome.
Understanding Conservative opinion of Liberals often requires understanding the concept of conflation. Liberal, a noun, denotes a political/economic philosophy. Liberal, an adjective, denotes a value judgement which is often contrasted to the adjective conservative. Many on the political/economic right have become very adept at combining the two distinct concepts in their rhetoric. This rhetorical device, called conflation, creates a false philosophy (a straw man) which the right attacks. These rhetorical attacks on Liberalism by the Right are what Liberals refer to as Bullshit. So, when you read posts about Liberals, or watch Fox News, check to see if the poster or speaker is using conflation to create a straw man attack on Liberalism. Visits to Conservapedia or Fox News can unfortunately result in a very offensive taint if you're not careful.
Liberals hate the following people:
The only known bad thing that is a Liberal is The Australian Liberal Party.
We're sure Conservatives would prefer to call these Liberal Faults, but we're Liberals and we're capable of learning and changing our behavior, so we prefer to see these traits as challenges.
As with any large grouping or community, there are different types of liberals who use different methods to try and spread the good that is liberalism.Don't forget there are plenty of sensible liberal who wear ordinary clothes, less conventional than what conservatives wear and want sensible things than make people happy and healthy like Universal Health Care Civil rights and Freedom.
A beatnik was a subculture of liberals most popular in the 1950s and 1960s. A typical beatnik tends to wear a striped black and white T-shirt, trousers, weird French hats, sandals and little glasses. They have also been known to form drum circles in green areas and read poetry.
Hippies were a more popular culture of nonconformity in the 1960s. Hippies are based on a very Liberal idea- open-mindedness and free love. A typical hippy carries an acoustic guitar with them in case they need to sing a song against the reactionaries and Conservatives. Hippies are one of the peace-loving groupings of the liberal culture. Hippies were useful in giving a middle finger to the old tradition of needing to be a right wing nutter to be a Christian, as many hippies believed in God and the idea of him loving everyone, regardless of race, gender and sexual orientation.
A suit Liberal is a liberal who wears a suit. These kind of liberals are the ones who tend to enter politics.
A punk is by far the most controversial breed of liberal, most popular in the late 1970s. Easily distinguishable by their typical attire of ripped jeans, leather studded jacks, colourful spiked hair and metal in various bodily parts, they are often associated with thuggish violence, but tend to hold liberal beliefs nonetheless. The weird clothes they wear are seen as a sign of nonconformity to the ordinary clothes regular people wear.
One of the most known of punk bands with highly liberal views are Anti-Flag.
Punks are also available in conservative format, and, more controversially, in neo-Nazi style. See Nazi Punks.
A general term used for someone who can play any array of rock-style instruments and also hold liberal beliefs. See Liberal Songs for more.
Continued here:
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