AFTER enduring five failed IVF attempts, most women might choose to retreat to deal with their grief in private.

But singer-songwriter Sinead McNally has done the opposite, sharing her struggles in a powerful new song and music video.

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The 40-year-old took the brave decision to share her personal story in a bid to start a conversation about one of the last taboo topics fertility.

She revealed: I work as a substitute primary teacher so Im of the opinion that its good to put something out there, especially something youre struggling with, because were always saying to kids, dont hold that in.

With fertility, I was a bit, I suppose ashamed is the word, in the beginning.

It sounds terrible, but I felt my body wasnt operating the way it should.

She was also struck by the secrecy surrounding infertility, explaining: Wed be in a coffee shop and you might be chatting about a cycle coming up and youd whisper.

I know you dont want everybody else to know your business but everybodys automatic reaction is to nearly whisper the letters IVF.

I suppose because Ive been frank in talking about it, it seems normal to me, but yet I knew it wasnt normalised.

Over the last four years, Sinead and her husband Conor have had repeated heartbreak with five unsuccessful rounds of IVF, attending clinics in Dublin, Hungary and Greece.

After their last disappointment, Sinead channelled her despair into her music, writing the song My Silent Night.

The accompanying music video by Zoe Kavanagh shows her using IVF needles to burst baby shower balloons.

She explained: When I was about to take the needles back to the chemist, I thought I cant, because they kind of represented the three or four years of my life up to that point.

With the video, all I needed to do was to bring the symbols of IVF and the loss. A lot of the loss is all the baby showers Ive been to over the years.

When I did the video I could genuinely feel the feelings of what its like to not have a child when you want one.

The Dundalk woman feels strongly that opening up the conversation can help lead to increased support for men and women in this position.

Ireland is one of only two EU countries that do not offer State funding for IVF.

Some private health insurers provide very limited cover but couples quickly amass huge debt while paying for IVF and associated treatments.

The Government has pledged to tackle the problem via its Assisted Human Reproduction Bill, but there is still no legislation and no funding in place.

Yet, financial support is just one of the missing pieces of the puzzle, as Sinead is also angry about the lack of medical leave for couples undergoing treatment.

She said: Its so unfair that a woman or a man has to take unpaid leave or holiday time.

Even working as a teacher, there isnt that allowance there for fertility treatment so youre taking unpaid leave or holidays.

You might have borrowed to get the cycle in place. So youre down your holidays and then youre trying to find more money if the cycle hasnt worked.

She added: I dont necessarily want to go back to work the day after my pregnancy test is negative. But I have to.

You should be able to say: I cant do this today, and not to be down the wages that you need.

You still have to pay the loans back and theres no baby still.

After so much heartache, Sinead and Conor are hopeful that another IVF cycle can help them achieve their dream of becoming parents.

And theyre buoyed by the hugely positive reaction to Sineads song.

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Sinead said: I was having sleepless nights in the months leading up to this, thinking: maybe this is a stupid thing to do, why am I letting people into my life?

One thing I noticed in the last week is that Ive gotten so much strength from people and I feel like if everybody could speak this way about something thats troubling them it would help.

Hear Sineads song on youtu.be/OW1iabHc8hM and on Spotify.

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See the article here:
Louth teacher puts pain of five failed rounds of IVF treatment into new song to raise awareness - The Irish Sun