Aimee Picchi, Special to USA TODAY Published 8:01 a.m. ET Dec. 21, 2019 | Updated 11:02 a.m. ET Dec. 23, 2019

Tipping your serverissecond nature at restaurants, but what about leaving a little something in other situations?It's a question that stirs confusion andanxiety more often during the holidays than at any other time of the year.

It turns out many Americans arent tipping their service providers at the holidays, according to a recent survey of more than 2,500 consumers by CreditCards.com. About half said they never tipped their childrens teachers or childcare providers, while 60% said they dont tip their mail carriers and another 70% said they dont tip trash collectors.

Many Americans arent tipping their various service providers at the holidays, according to a recent survey of more than 2,500 consumers by CreditCards.com.(Photo: AndreyPopov, Getty Images/iStockphoto)

If these are people who are helping you out throughout the year, it's a nice thing to do," saysTed Rossman, industry analyst at CreditCards.com.

It may not be entirely your fault that you're remiss in tipping. Many people are likely unaware of social norms that surround tokens of appreciation.

Rossman sayswhen he worked as a camp counselor, for example, parents often tipped him at the end of the summer. But his parents had never tipped because they didnt know about the tradition.

They found out they were being inadvertently cheap, he recalls.

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Tipping norms are also rapidly changing due to the shifting economy, says Steve Dublanica, the author of Keep the Change: A Clueless Tipper's Quest to Become the Guru of the Gratuity and a former waiter.

Leaving a gratuity is now more widespread because of the rise of payment apps and gig economy jobs that didnt exist before smartphones, he says. On top of that, many workers are toiling in jobs that neither pay well nor come with benefits, which means theyre increasingly dependent on tips, Dublanica says.

That may be why tip creep is occurring in restaurants, coffee shops, and taxiand car services, he notes. A decade ago, the standard tip was 15%, but now the base service tip is considered to be about 20%, he says.

Consumers who snub tipping because they believe employers should pay their workers more are only hurting the workers, not the employers, he adds. Sometimes when people say, I'm not tipping, they are insulating themselves from the reality of the person in front of them.

Consumers who snub tipping because they believe employers should pay their workers more are only hurting the workers, not the employers.(Photo: Julia Thompson/USA TODAY)

Along those lines, not tipping at the holidays is terrible, Dublanica says. Offering a gratuity is the recognition that you are of value and of worth.

Workers who dont typically receive a tip but provide you a service throughout the year should receive a reward at the holidays, he adds. For instance, handymen, landscapers, dog walkers and babysitters are among those you should tip around the holidays.

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For these workers, provide a tip thats equal to the cost of one service. That means if you have a personal trainer who charges $75 a session, tip the trainer an extra $75 before the holidays.

But, experts say, tipped workers like hairdressers and your favorite barista should also get a little extra at the holidays. A hairdressershould receive the cost of one service. Your favorite baristas or waiter should get a generous tip of around 40% on the price of a holiday meal or drink, Dublanica says.

There are a few cases when tipping gets tricky.Because they are government workers, mail carriers arent allowed to accept cash or gift cards that can be converted to cash. And any gift must be worth less than $20, according to postal regulations.

Food items, crafts or even a handwritten note can be a thoughtful holiday gift for your mail carrier, CreditCards.coms Rossman says. He pointed to a viral video posted on Facebook earlier this month that showed a delivery drivers reaction to a basket of sodas and snacks left out for him.

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He was so thankful and appreciative and surprised, Rossman says.

Tipping teachers, especially for families with teenagers, may also be tricky because families dont want to be seen as bribing the instructors for better grades or college recommendations, Rossman adds. But cards, food or small tokens of appreciation can be well-received without crossing any ethical lines.

Even so, because tipping is based on social norms, there are plenty of grey areas.

Dublanica says his final rule of thumb is the golden rule.He says: If it was you, what would you want?

Aimee Picchi is a business journalist whose work appears in publications including USA Today, CBS News and Consumer Reports. She previously spent almost a decade covering tech and media for Bloomberg News. You can find her on Twitter at @aimeepicchi.

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Not tipping is 'terrible' during the holidays, but many Americans aren't doing it - USA TODAY