UNSPLASH

"Our families struggle to accept that a disease is going to take us away from them, but the disease is going to take us anyway - we don't have an option or say in that." (File photo)

OPINION: As a passionate advocate for thislegislationand as someone living with incurable stage IV metastatic breast cancer I am, unfortunately, fully conversant with how my disease plays out, and it isn't for the faint-hearted.

I was first diagnosed with breast cancer in 1997 and then again in 2002.

I continueto take each day as it comes, along with surgical interventions, chemotherapy and radiation.

When the terminal metastatic breast cancerdiagnosis came in 2016, even as an advocate for this legislation, I wanted to do what I could - but on my terms and within my own boundaries when it comes to treatment and its side-effects.

READ MORE:*Assisted dying referendum: why NZ's law lacks necessary detail to make a fully informed decision*Act 'offers choice, not compulsion'*End of life choice comes down to compassion

The reason I am alive is because of chemotherapy and hormonal drugs. I'm on my third line of treatment now. The nature of my disease means that each treatment eventually stops working.

Metastatic breast cancer is one of the crueller cancer diseases;ask anyone who has lost a loved one to this insidious disease. The extent to which it progresses knows no bound: all major organs, the brain, the stomach, the eyes, the bones, the spine.

I'm a member of a private support group of 6000 women from all over the world. Each day we read and share the extent of the suffering, including many photos inquiring 'is this normal?' due to radical side effects from treatments.And then, the dreaded posts from a family member who advises that their loved one is no longer with us.

Readingthefear and anxiety ofthose dealing with metastatic bone disease when they start to experience fractures and need tohave steel rods surgically inserted to support ravaged bones is extremely tough. This is the reality of my disease.

I will not apologise for asking not to have to go right to the very end of all that this disease has to offer.

Every terminally ill New Zealander deserves the voluntaryright to choose the option of an assisted death during the last sixmonths of their lives.Currently those who oppose have it their way - those who are walking the terminal cancer walkdon't have any options.

We should be able to take the good days, the quality days and enjoy them, having peace of mind that when we've had enough we can say we've had enough.

The most important voice of all in this debate is the voice of the individual who has to travel this journey.

The Act offers the voluntary option to say when "enough is enough" and, trust me, the suffering comes way before the last sixmonths of life.

The issue is that as a society we find it difficult to come to terms with having conversations about death.

Our families struggle to accept that a disease is going to take us away from them, but the disease is going to take us anyway - we don't have an option or say in that.

The very least we can hope for is to say we don't want our suffering to be prolonged, outside of what our disease is going to dish out, or what the chemotherapy, radiation and other chemical cocktails do to our bodies.

I am a wife and a mother, and my family respects my wish for an assisted death.

When there is talk about families and their input - I can assure you that I would rather my children watch me die peacefully than have to live with the trauma of remembering, for years, how my own parents died.

Assisted dying is not about ending life, it's about ending suffering when you no longer have the option of living - you haven't made that decision, itwas taken out of your hands.

The very least you can expect is to be able to call it a day when your disease and treatments cause nothing but pain and suffering.

Every man and his dog has an opinion or view on this legislation, but it's not every man and his dog who are going to die the way others have to die.

More here:

Euthanasia referendum: The most important voices in this debate are the terminally ill - Stuff.co.nz