Too many times, we avoid those in pain because we arent sure what to say.

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Editor's note: A version of this column was published previously at crucialskills.com.

Dear Joseph,

My husband recently passed away, and although Im sure they dont mean to hurt me, several of my friends and family members have made insensitive comments about my loss or the way I grieve. For example, people have told me, It was Gods will and Its time to get on with your life. I know they are trying to help, but I dont know what to say when somebody belittles my pain. How can I respond to seemingly insensitive comments about my husbands death?

Signed,

Dont Make It Worse

Im so sorry about your husband. Im especially sorry that the pain youre feeling has been compounded by others actions. I wish I could help with the first problem, but I hope to offer some helpful ideas for solving the second.

I asked readers to share their perspective. Many wrote back about their experiences from which three clear messages emerged.

See original here:
Insights from the Behavioral Science Guy: The worst (and best) things to say to someone who is grieving