Im not doing this again. Find another cook. So the search began for an alternative family vacation. Dude ranches. Cruises. Safaris. We couldnt reach a consensus.
Why dont you look into Club Med? a friend suggested.
Are you kidding? Take our tender kids to gawk at topless girls and eager guys sucking on straws stuck into coconuts? I dont think so.
To confirm our pilgrim conclusion we Googled their site in Cancun. Seems times have changed. Hedonism out. Families in. (OK, so theres a bit of hedonism.)
We have three kids, and they have six, from 6 to 23. Where can we find a place that caters to our myriad diversions? Where the daily buffets lay out a dozen desserts. Where you can have a mid-morning mojito. Where you can go back to summer camp.
The answer: a pre-paid all inclusive package where your only burden is to wear a bracelet which gives you the run of the place plus, unlocks your room.
A 15-minute drive from the Cancun airport, the massive doors open to an ocean estate perfectly laid out for every family configuration. Each room opens onto water; many of the rooms surround a private lagoon. All are spacious and meticulously kept by a bevy of housekeepers.
The first, second, and third reason for these reunions is to give our disparate family a weeks time to stretch out and catch up. Short of weddings and graduations, were tethered by jobs and school to our separate corners. Lying under palapas, cocktails by the pool, but mostly sobre mesa across the table we can reconnect and deepen our family ties.
We established our breakfast table just off the not-for-weightwatchers buffet. Beyond fresh squeezed juices and the length of fresh, local fruit, we each wandered off to have at the fantasies that well never see at home. For one grandchild is was Nutella crepes. Another favorite was chilaquiles (tortillas swimming in a rich salsa and covered with cheese). Then theres pastries with a side of waffle. Smoked salmon and bagels. Omelettes to order. And for the late-nighters theres cactus detox juice.
A favorite game was to try and guess a familys nationality before they spoke. We were stumped by a family from Lithuania. Or lean over the rail and count needlefish, barracuda, and the odd tarpon. (And theres the regular appearance of harmless caimans.) One morning, my son said it all: What would I do if I didnt have to do anything?
The Hacienda buffet is changed for lunch and, again, for dinner. Stations include a carving medium-rare roast beef and juicy chicken and duck, a taco and fajita bar, pastas, cold seafood, and an array of ice creams. (The Club has two underwhelming white tablecloth restaurants and a wine bar.)
Beckon a waiter and order a beer, wine, mixed drinks and, of course, a Shirley Temple. (Actually, beckon a waiter and you can have an umbrella drink right after you roll out of bed.) It doesnt take more than a few hours after arrival to adapt to the notion that everything everything is included in the package. No credit cards, no room numbers, no signatures.
The service and warmth went beyond that of many grand hotels. From beach sweepers to chambermaids to bartenders to trapeze instructors came hellos and smiles from dawn till the last dance of the night. Your wish is my command seemed virtually a mantra.
The day opened with a seemingly endless choice of activities waterskiing on the lagoon, archery (archery?), trapeze, snorkeling, scuba diving, tennis even salsa dancing. Thats just a random batch. Staying fit? Theres water aerobics in one of two enormous pools, power walking, all the way up to mega Zumba.
My son and I went fly fishing for snook and tarpon. The boys played one of two nearby golf courses, which they rated beautifully maintained and not outrageously expensive by resort standards. The rest went parasailing and a day later swam with dolphins. (How many photos can you take of grandkids kissing these creatures or posing with toucans perched on their heads?)
My take-away scene was watching my 6-year-old granddaughter climb a 25-foot narrow ladder to a trapeze platform, being tied to a safety line, grabbing the bar, and sailing out over the catch net, pumping her legs for height.
For us real potatoes, theres the beach of fine, white sand lined with palm-roofed palapas giving shade. Uniformed waiters weave around the lounges carrying chilled tropical drinks. Waves curl and splash under gliding frigate birds. The Caribbean tableau.
Nights brought professional shows including a Mariachi band, a circus trapeze act, Mexican folk dancing, synchronized swimming (goofy).
Sitting over cocktails on our final evening as the sun set red, we talked about our next biannual gathering. A few tepid alternatives were raised. They flopped. So Cancun 2021 it is.
Clinking of margarita glasses.
John Sherman can be reached at johnlewissherman@gmail.com.
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A family vacation with something for everyone - The Boston Globe
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